Childhood Sexual Abuse Therapy
Sacramento

In person in Midtown Sacramento & Online Throughout California

Did sexual abuse in your childhood fracture your sense of safety and love?

Did someone who was supposed to keep you safe instead make you feel bad & different?
Did you grow up too fast, needing to find ways to cope with the secret of CSA?
Do you still flashback to feelings and memories from time causing you to struggle in your adult relationships and life?
Are the Epstein files and CSA headlines disrupting your life –and you feel like no one understands?

Even as the world is becoming more aware of how common childhood sexual abuse (CSA) is, it does not mean that people have gotten better at supporting each other and having empathy for the experiences of survivors.

Survivors of CSA often feel alone even when the abuse was many years ago and even if others have tried to support them. Childhood is a time when we most need to feel safe, loved, and protected. CSA disrupts these needs and affects the way we feel about ourselves and how secure we can feel in adult relationships.

Childhood sexual abuse tells us we are alone. We aren’t alone and we do deserve healing.

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Childhood sexual abuse is far too common in society.

According to RAIN.org, every 9 minutes a child experiences sexual abuse. That’s 63,000+ victims of CSA a year. The likelihood that these crimes are underreported is high; the actual numbers may be significantly higher.

Children are significantly at risk of CSA because they are vulnerable and depend on adults for safety. Most often CSA is committed by someone close to the survivor: a family member, trusted family friend, or an authority figure in their school, church, or extracurricular activities.

CSA is confusing to the developing mind of a child. In order to survive their experiences, they may take responsibility for the abuse. They may be afraid of getting in trouble so they hide what happened from other adults, or sadly if they tell adults they may find that they aren’t protected or they are even blamed.

Childhood sexual abuse has lasting impacts on the survivors of the abuse even if they grow up into adults who seem to have it all together.

Because our brains were still developing during our trauma, the beliefs about ourselves and others that were then created may still be affecting how safe we feel in relationships and the world.

We are resilient and survived so much, and we still might find we experience:

Feeling scared, numb, or shut down when we begin to get close in relationships
Hypervigilance when it comes to our own safety or the safety of our children
Waves of big and overwhelming emotions including anger, panic, dread, or grief
Avoidance of close friendships, intimacy, romantic relationships or community activities
Feelings that something is “wrong” with us or that we are “bad” or “dirty”
Hopelessness or distress related to feeling like there is no justice

These experiences and others can be confusing and we can feel like we can feel like we are losing control or like we’ll never be “normal”. It can feel like so much was taken from us so early in our life and there is no getting it back.

CSA Therapy can help you gain the hope & safety you always deserved.

You were hurt and betrayed in relationships with people who were supposed to keep you safe. Love Heal Grow’s trauma therapists can help CSA survivors:

Find self-compassion and learn to forgive yourself for any feelings of guilt and shame
Work through complex feelings of anger, grief, and anxiety
Process the past in a way that integrates it into your life, but no longer gives it power over you in your present
Feel less alone and more trusting in current relationships
Find ways to ground yourself in the present so you no longer feel out of control
Create the life and relationships you want

Not all therapists are equipped to handle CSA survivors with the sensitivity and level of support that is needed. Love Heal Grow therapists are trained in evidence based models and trauma-informed modalities that will help you feel safe while you heal.

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There isn’t anything wrong with you.

You survived the trauma of CSA exactly how you needed to at the time. No matter what you did or didn’t do, how you told or didn’t told, or who did or did not show up for you–you did not deserve what happened and it wasn’t your fault.

Your adult brain now may be trying to keep you safe in ways that may be inadvertently getting in your way of thriving. This isn’t your fault either–this is what trauma does.

But it doesn’t need to be this way. You don’t need to feel stuck anymore.

What To Expect In CSA Therapy

Depending on where you are in your healing, you may choose to come to therapy alone or with a partner. 1:1 trauma therapy is focused on your own healing and couples therapy may integrate what you’ve learned in your own healing to help your current relationship feel more secure.

Your CSA therapist will:

Help you set a pace for therapy that feels right to you–they won’t push you to get over things or make you talk about your memories of childhood sexual abuse in detail
Help you (and your loved ones if they are included) understand how your past experiences impact your present
Teach and practice new skills that help you find relief during times of panic, anxiety, flashbacks and out of control emotions
Help you make sense of your past and current experiences, while finding new ways to look at things so that you no longer need to get stuck in shame, guilt, or hopelessness.
Forgive yourself for the pain of the past, grieve for the support you didn’t have as a child or adult, and find new meaning in your life and relationships

Love Heal Grow therapists have various ways of supporting you in therapy including EMDR, IFS, Emotionally Focused Therapy and more. Contact us or read about our therapists online to find the therapist who you think will be the best fit for your needs.

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Childhood sexual abuse survivors are too often retraumatized in therapy–and it shouldn’t be this way!

Trauma therapy techniques are evolving and some are more helpful than others. Unfortunately, some therapists or the therapeutic modality they use can do major harm to survivors.

Therapy should not be blaming or expect survivors to forgive in order to move on. It’s normal for trauma survivors to be triggered in adult relationships, including therapeutic relationships. When this happens if the therapist takes it personally, becomes overwhelmed by the survivor’s emotions, or pushes the survivor too hard.

CSA trauma therapy requires deep understanding and empathy for the survivor’s experience, specific therapeutic skills that do not retraumatize survivors, and good support for the therapist so they can do their best work. Love Heal Grow therapists are equipped with these needs to give you the best care.

But Maybe You’re Not Sure If CSA Therapy Is Right For You…

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Will you make me talk about the abuse?

No. Your therapist will help you decide the safest way for you to reprocess and heal your past. It is not required for you to share details about your abuse in order for you to heal. You may however want to share the details because you feel the need for someone to hear your story. If this is the case, your therapist will help you share in a way that doesn’t overwhelm your trauma symptoms. You take the lead here.

Do you have to report the abuse I experienced to law enforcement or CPS?

Sometimes people are afraid to start therapy for their trauma because they don’t want anyone to know about what happened. If you are an adult, we do not report the abuse you experienced to law enforcement or CPS. If you want to report your abuse, we can help you discuss your options here, but mandated reporters aren’t required to report past child abuse if the victim is now an adult.

If however the person who abused you has access to children and there are signs that abuse happened to anyone who is currently a child, your therapist is required to report this to CPS. They would discuss this with you and they can only share the details that they know about the abuse of the current child. They are happy to answer any questions you have about this.

My partner does not understand my trauma. Should I do couples therapy?

Couples therapy with a CSA therapist can definitely be helpful for you and your relationship. Love Heal Grow’s founder actually wrote a whole book for partners to help them understand the impact of the abuse you suffered.

Couples therapy will be effective if you also have had or currently have a place to process your individual experiences and find some healing for your abuse–if your couples therapist thinks you will do better if you also have individual support they will let you know and they can connect you to another CSA therapist at Love Heal Grow.

If your partner has too hard of a time building empathy for your experience and they are not showing interest in increasing their ability to support you, your couples therapist may connect them with their own individual therapist or request that couples therapy be paused until your partner is open to growing in this way.

Love Heal Grow Therapists:

Linda Rolufs, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 240 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Anxiety & OCD, Menopausal and post-menopausal women wanting more pleasure in sex, Women who feel invisible

Joanna de Leon, AMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 180 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Burnout & Pressure to be Successful, Immigrants & First Gen, Current & Former Athletes, People who Avoid Conflict

Natalie Delfin, LCSW (she/they)

Therapist & Assistant Director | 230 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, More Pleasurable Sex, Learning to express feelings, CNM & Kink, QTBIPOC, Couples with differing sexual desires

Maddie McCain, AMFT

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, LGBTQ+, Low Self Esteem, Caregivers & People Pleasers, Painful relationships with parents

Maria Dimachkie, LCSW (she/her)

EMDR Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Survivors of Trauma: Sexual Assault & Relationship Abuse; People who have been hurt by loved ones; Difficult Childhoods

Abby Hollandsworth, AMFT (she/they)

Therapist | 180 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Intimate Connection, Anxiety-Depression-Anger, LGBTQ+, Religious Trauma & Grief