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I Want to Talk About Sex, But I’m Too Scared!

We aren’t really having sex anymore…is she not attracted to me anymore? Sex is starting to feel routine – I wish we could try something new…how do I tell him without hurting his feelings or making him mad? I keep turning her down because I hate how I look...

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Public Speaking, Performance Anxiety…and Sex.

Have you heard that statistic that public speaking is most people's number one fear – rated higher for most folks than their fear of death?   It’s often not the actual act of speaking publicly that we are afraid of. It’s all the negative thoughts and...

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Relationship Conflict is a Good Thing

In my work, I love nothing more than being able to support people in building their ideal life and relationships.   I truly believe that most things we can hope for and envision are possible with time persistence support from others, and...

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When Body Insecurities Affect Your Sex Life

  A couple sits in my office.  One partner is sad and frustrated that the other doesn't seem to be interested in sex anymore.  They are feeling very rejected.   The other partner says quietly, eyes looking down, "Honestly, it's not about you.  I don't like...

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Erectile Dysfunction: Sex Therapy Can Help

  Here at Love Heal Grow Counseling, we are contacted multiple times a week by men who are experiencing erectile dysfunction (ED).  Sometimes it's been going on for years, sometimes they thought the issues were behind them only to be caught off guard by more...

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Women & Low Sexual Desire – Sex Therapy

Myth: Women are less sexual than men.   Myth: Women lose all interest in sex after marriage or as they get older.   Myth: If you don't get turned on easily or often, you don't enjoy or care about sex as much as someone who does.   Women who have a low...

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Why Emotions are So Important

   Emotions aren't just touchy-feely fluff.  We need to take the time to express our emotions and to validate our partner's emotions because this is what connects us as human beings.  When we let ourselves better understand each other's emotions, we'll feel...

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Accepting Our Partner’s Corrections

   When we take a chance in guessing how our partner is feeling, we might get it wrong--that's okay!  If our partner corrects us, accept this graciously and take their correction to better understand how they are truly feeling.    ...

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Showing Our Partner We Understand Them

 Our partner will feel heard and understood when we take time to show them what exactly it is we are understanding. It can be as simple as mirroring back a summary of what they have shared or--even more meaningful--we can acknowledge their most important feelings...

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Putting Ourself in Their Shoes

   You know your partner best, so you have the best ability to listen to them and really imagine how they are feeling.  Let your own knowledge about the type of person that they are, what is most important to them, what they have been going through and how they...

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Listening With Strong Interest & Putting Our Stuff on Hold

   When our partner is talking to us about something important, we have our own reactions going on inside (thoughts, opinions, feelings and advice).  If we want our partner to feel supported when they are opening up, we can put our own stuff on hold in order to...

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Body Language Matters!

 Today we're talking about body language and how it can help or hurt your relationship. Do you know what signals you are sending when you and your partner are talking? How are we helping or hurting the conversation with the signals we are sending? We are so in tune...

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When Everything’s Good, but Sex is Awkward

You and your partner have a pretty strong relationship. You can talk about most things, you handle conflict without blowing up at each other, and you support each other’s hopes and dreams. There’s trust in the relationship and you feel comfortable opening up about...

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Why Your Arguments are Going Nowhere

Every now and then a couple comes to me saying things like: -“We have a really strong relationship.” -“We usually communicate really well.” -“We just have this one problem that we can’t work through—can you help us?!”   Committed couples make a lot of decisions...

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Why “The Pina Colada Song” Makes Me Cry

You know the song Escape by Rupert Holmes?   If you like pina coladas…and getting caught in the rain… I had always thought of it as a fun, cheesy summer time song that would pop up on the oldies station.  I hadn’t ever really paid attention to the lyrics.  ...

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One Month to More Connection in Your Relationship

31 discussion topics to get you on the road to better intimacy. One way we build intimacy and connection is to be able to share important/deeper parts of ourselves with our partner and for them to be able to truly hear us when we do. This exercise can be done daily...

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