Divorce Therapy
Sacramento

In person in Midtown Sacramento & Online Throughout California

Are Plans for Separation Impacting Your Relationship And Family?

Is your heart breaking even though you know this is the right decision?
Are you worried about how your divorce or separation may impact your family and especially your children?
Do you want closure on an important and once very loving relationship?

You entered this relationship with so much hope. It felt like you finally found the person who understood you and would be there for you unconditionally.

After months or years of conflict, resentment has festered and pain has multiplied. You’ve tried to hear each other, maybe you’ve even tried therapy before. You’re worried that it’s too late and you’re exploring whether divorce or a separation may be the best next step.

You need help finding your way–there’s so much pain, but you don’t want to cause your children distress or make things even worse as you break up. You want to honor the love you once had and your years together with as calm and as supportive of a separation as possible.

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Divorce is the second most stressful life event you can experience.

Second only to the death of a spouse, divorce or separation wreaks more havoc on your life than any other stressful life event. You may have entered your relationship believing that your commitment would last forever. You feel guilty and embarrassed as you think about letting people know about the break up. It can feel like you’ve failed or maybe even worst, that you’ve let down your children.

On top of this, your heart is still breaking even if you do not want to be married to this person anymore. You are letting go of the hope you’ve held that it could get better. You are filled with so many emotions- grief, anger, and maybe even fear about what comes next.

This can be so much to carry alone. You want to be on the other side of this divorce–you want to feel like yourself again.

Most of us were raised to believe that divorce is a failure.

Couples therapy can push us to believe if we just tried hard enough, any relationship can survive.

Our parents may have stayed together even when they were clearly unsatisified. Our best friends might seem like they have the perfect marriage. Our religion or culture may tell us that breaking up would be taboo.

We may have heard research that kids are most well adjusted if their parents stay together. The last thing we want to do is hurt our children.

All of this pressure can pile increasingly levels of shame upon us. Sometimes divorce is still the right call. It doesn’t need to be seen as a failure and it can sometimes lead to the most successful out comes for you AND your children.

Divorce therapy can help you and your coparenting relationship

Whether you are coming to therapy by yourself or with your (ex)partner, therapy can be the bridge that gets you from pain and confusion to the peaceful and joyful life your family deserves.

Even though you’ve decided you’d like to end your romantic relationship, there may still be many hurdles to navigate:

telling your family and friends
coparenting your children for the rest of your lives
making big financial decisions
new routines, boundaries, and holiday traditions.

Letting ourselves grief and learning important relationship skills in divorce therapy can help you thrive through this difficult time.

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Counseling offers a foundation for you to separate with mutual respect & care

If you are looking for a way to divorce with dignity, therapy may be right for you. Love Heal Grow therapists understand the challenges couples have during break ups. We are here to support you with warmth and clear direction.

Grieving a relationship and navigating new boundaries is hard for anyone. You don’t need to walk this path alone.

What To Expect In Sessions

Your therapist understands deciding to separate might be the hardest decision you’ve made in your life. They are here to help you identify what each of your primary needs are in order to move forward. You may work to establish new expectations for communication, family logistics, and planning for the future all while finding healthy ways to heal.

Therapy sessions will provide you with emotional support and separation skills that allow you to decrease divorce distress and increase your healing, including:

Effective communication techniques that help you move from a romantic partnership to a respectful non-partnered dynamic
Tips that will help you navigate new family or parenting dynamics, uncoupling, and common divorce stressors
A space for healing that highlights your strengths, honors the good times, and allows you to move on with peace.

You might come to therapy together or alone during this time. Either choice can lead to successful divorce counseling that allows you and your family to thrive. While no one enters a relationship looking forward to the end, the pain we feel is a sign of the love that was or is there. It is possible to heal and end your relationship with peace for your children–and for yourselves!

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Our therapists are trauma-informed and prioritize healthy relationships for all involved

We integrate evidence-based methods that support healing and growth wherever the future may take you, including Discernment Counseling and the Gottman Method for couples or former partners. Discernment therapy may help you gain clarity on whether you should stay together or break up. Gottman Method provides invaluable skills that will help you communicate effectively and coparent in a healthy way.

Separation may bring up grief or even trauma. As trauma-informed therapists, we are prepared for you to heal from your divorce so that shame or feelings of failure don’t carry with you for years to come. Your divorce does not mean you are a bad person, parent or that you are unlovable. You deserve a place for healing.

But Maybe You’re Not Sure If Divorce Therapy Is Right For You…

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I don't want our therapist to push us to reconcile.

A lot of the time when we tell people we are divorcing, they may have questions on whether we’ve tried everything to make it work. We may feel pressure to stay together or judgment about our decision. Your therapist will NOT take this stance. Divorce can be the healthiest choice for a family and we are here to support you towards your goals–we won’t try to change your mind.

I'm only doing this for the kids--is that okay?

Yes, absolutely. Research shows that kids are happy when their parents are happy. Even if that means happily divorced. Learning to regulate our emotions, set boundaries, and communicate during co-parenting conflict will be extremely beneficial to you and your children’s lives. We don’t expect you to rehash all your relationship resentments. We can leave that in the past and move forward to a healthy co-parenting relationship.

Can I come to divorce therapy alone?

Yes. Each Love Heal Grow therapist is prepared to help you navigate the grief and complicated times that come post-break up.

Part of you may still care about this person. You may feel traumatized by betrayal or feelings of rejection. All of this is normal and divorce counseling can help you heal from the past and give you new skills to thrive in the present.

Love Heal Grow Therapists:

Emma Derstine, APCC (she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Childhood and Adult Relationship Trauma, People who feel unlovable & misunderstood

Megan Negendank, LMFT, CST Founder (she/her)

Owner & Founder | 450 per session | Not accepting clients

Maria Dimachkie, LCSW (she/her)

Trauma Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Survivors of Trauma: Sexual Assault & Relationship Abuse; People who have been hurt by loved ones; People who question themselves a lot

Hannah Slicton-Williams, LMFT (she/her)

Trauma Therapist | 240 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Healing from Trauma & Bad Relationships, Survivors, Analytical thinkers (Lawyers, Engineers, Law Enforcement)

Madison Hamzy, LMFT (she/her)

Therapist & Assistant Director | 300 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Intimate Connection & Less Stress, Men with ED or ADHD, People who get stuck in their heads and worry a lot

Melanie Rivera, AMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Anxiety & Trauma, Parenting Couples, Hurting in relationships

Susan DuBay, LMFT (she/they)

IFS Therapist & Clinical Supervisor | 240 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Intimacy, Healing from Betrayal & Trauma, High-Masking Neurodivergence, LGBTQ+