Does Couples Therapy Mean Our Relationship Is Over?

by

Maybe we should see a therapist.

 

The comment whirls around in your head as you eat your dinner. What was wrong? I mean, yeah, we argue sometimes, but everyone does, right? You glance at your partner. They seem happy to you, enjoying the dinner in front of them.

 

Why would you need to see a therapist? Does your partner think that the relationship is failing? Do they think it’s over?

 

The Common Misconception

It is normal for couples — either both members or just one — to feel nervous about the idea of couples therapy. It is even normal for people to fear the idea of going to a therapist, especially a relationship therapist.

 

Most of the time, people’s exposure to therapy is what they see in the media. And let’s make no mistake, the portrayal of couples therapy in the media is less than flattering. We see fictional characters try therapy only for them to realize that it can’t work between them and break up.

 

But reality isn’t media. We have to understand that media thrives off of drama — it is why when any “will they won’t they” relationship finally happens they are immediately saddled with struggles that break them up. But this isn’t how reality works for most people. 

 

For most people, couples therapy is a way to strengthen a relationship, not end it. Here, we’ll go over some of the benefits couples therapy can have on any relationship. 

 

5 Ways Couples Therapy Can Benefit Any Relationship

Couples therapy isn’t just for the “lost causes,” it can benefit any couple — whether they’ve just started a relationship, have been married for 50 years, or anywhere in between.

 

1. Improved Communication

All couples — no matter how healthy — will have arguments. However, if you and your partner are experiencing frequent arguments that are causing one or both of you great deals of distress, talking with a therapist may be a good idea. 

 

A therapist can help to guide you and your partner and help provide more effective methods of communication. They can help you to work through the underlying issues that may be causing arguments so that you can better connect — even during a disagreement.

 

2. Better Emotional Connection

Over time, as life continues to get busier, many couples can find themselves feeling less connected to each other. Maybe you’ve both gotten new jobs and you’re busy with work or you’ve got a new baby and you’re spending your time focusing on your child rather than your partner.

 

This lack of time to connect with your partner can lead to feelings of loneliness or lack of support in your relationship. Going to couples therapy can help you and your partner to find ways that you both can prioritize each other even with your busy schedules and create a stronger emotional connection for you both.

3. Improved Physical Intimacy

It is not uncommon for one (or both) members of a relationship to find themselves dissatisfied with their sex life. And to make matters more complicated, many people find talking about sex uncomfortable and actively avoid the subject — even if they are unhappy with what is (or isn’t) happening.

 

A therapist can help both you and your partner to talk about your sexual concerns, expectations, or unmet needs in a safe and supportive space. This can help both your partner and yourself to get the level of physical intimacy that you are wanting from your relationship.

 

4. Supporting One Another

Whether you’re going through a time of grief (such as the loss of a loved one or health problems) or a time of major life changes (such as marriage, children, or a new job) providing the support your partner needs can be extremely challenging. Especially if both of you are greatly affected by the change. 

 

With a couples therapist, you can both get the support you need to move through your difficult time — together.

 

5. Living Healthier and Longer

Did you know that our relationships with others have an incredible influence on our health? A Harvard study (spanning over almost 80 years) made the revelation that how happy we are in our relationships is actually a better predictor of living long and happy lives than social class, IQ, or even genetics.

 

While couples therapy can’t directly ensure that anyone lives longer, it can help you and your partner to build a healthy and supportive relationship that can greatly improve both you and your partner’s happiness.

 

Couples therapy isn’t just a last-ditch effort to save a failing relationship. In fact, the best time to go to couples therapy is before it is “needed.” Starting couples therapy proactively can be a foundational part of creating a healthy and happy relationship. 

 

If you and your partner want help building a strong and healthy relationship, don’t hesitate to reach out to us. At Love Heal Grow we would love to hear from you — whether you’re interested in getting started with couples therapy or just have some questions you’d like to ask!

 

Love Heal Grow Therapists
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Megan Negendank, LMFT, CST Founder (she/her)

Megan Negendank, LMFT, CST Founder (she/her)

CEO & Founder | 450 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Relationship Trauma, Emotional & Physical Intimacy, Executives & Creatives
Madison Hamzy, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Madison Hamzy, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist & Assistant Director | 250 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Intimate Connection & Less Stress, Men with ED or ADHD, People who get stuck in their heads and worry a lot
Natalie Delfin, LCSW (she/they)

Natalie Delfin, LCSW (she/they)

Therapist & Clinical Supervisor | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, More Pleasurable Sex, Men learning to express feelings, CNM & Kink, Queer & Trans
Rachel Cloud, LCSW (she/her)

Rachel Cloud, LCSW (she/her)

Therapist & Clinical Supervisor | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Healing from Abuse & Betrayal, Queer & Trans Identity, People who care deeply and are told they are "too much"
Ann Marie McKnight, LMFT (she/her)

Ann Marie McKnight, LMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 250 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Grief & Loss, Childhood Emotional Neglect, Family Therapy for Parents & Adult Children
Jessie Regan, LMFT (she/her)

Jessie Regan, LMFT (she/her)

Therapist & Clinical Supervisor | 270 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Healing from Infidelity, Discernment & Divorce, Workplace Stress & Pressure
Linda Rolufs, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Linda Rolufs, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 240 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Anxiety & OCD, Menopausal and post-menopausal women wanting more pleasure in sex, Women who feel invisible
Ashley Barnes, LMFT (she/her)

Ashley Barnes, LMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, High-Achievers & Type-A Personalities, Intimacy & Connection, Low Self Esteem, Trauma & Anxiety
Lindsay Glass, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Lindsay Glass, LMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Parenting Couples, Cycle-breaking Moms, Deep Thinkers & Deep Feelers
Maegan Tanner, AMFT (she/her)

Maegan Tanner, AMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Stress & Burnout, LGBTQ+, People who judge themselves a lot
Susan DuBay, LMFT (she/they)

Susan DuBay, LMFT (she/they)

IFS Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Intimacy, LGBTQ+, Folks wanting to go deep in their trauma work
Emily Alampi, AMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Emily Alampi, AMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Anxiety & Stress, Frustration & Anger, Queer & Trans, Neurodivergence, People who feel like they don't fit in
Charisse Brass, AMFT (she/her)

Charisse Brass, AMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Emotional & Physical Connection, Stress & Burnout in Highly Productive People, Existential Angst & Life Meaning
Joanna de Leon, AMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Joanna de Leon, AMFT (Online Only, she/her)

Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Burnout & Pressure to be Successful, Immigrants & First Gen, Current & Former Athletes, People who Avoid Conflict
Flo Oliveira, AMFT (they/them)

Flo Oliveira, AMFT (they/them)

Sex Therapist | 170 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, QTBIPOC, More Pleasure in Sex, CNM & Kink Affirming, People worried about their porn-use & sexual behaviors
Maria Dimachkie, ACSW (she/her)

Maria Dimachkie, ACSW (she/her)

Trauma Therapist | 180 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Survivors of Trauma: Sexual Assault & Relationship Abuse; People who have been hurt by loved ones; People who question themselves a lot
Samaria Parada, AMFT (she/ella)

Samaria Parada, AMFT (she/ella)

Bilingual Therapist | 160 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Connection, Family & Cultural Stress & Trauma, BIPOC & First Gen
Madilyn Schweikert, AMFT (she/her)

Madilyn Schweikert, AMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 160 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Intimacy, Betrayal & Infidelity, Couples with age gaps, Creatives & Sensitive People
Ella Sword, AMFT (she/her)

Ella Sword, AMFT (she/her)

Therapist | 160 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Connection, Parenting, Anxiety & Depression
Hannah Slicton-Williams, LMFT (she/her)

Hannah Slicton-Williams, LMFT (she/her)

Trauma Therapist | 200 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Healing from Trauma - Relationship Abuse, Violence, and Sexual Assault, Love after Trauma
Abby Hollandsworth, AMFT (she/they)

Abby Hollandsworth, AMFT (she/they)

Therapist | 160 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Communication & Intimate Connection, Anxiety-Depression-Anger, LGBTQ+, Religious Trauma & Grief
Ashlene Kaur Sandhu (she/her)

Ashlene Kaur Sandhu (she/her)

Therapist | Sliding Scale (100-140 per session) | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Connection & Intimacy, Perfectionism & Low Self-Esteem, Cultural Pressure & Relationship with Parents
Liza Haroldson, LCSW (she/her)

Liza Haroldson, LCSW (she/her)

Therapist | 240 per session | Relationship & Sex Therapy, Intimacy & Connection, Parents, Healing from Trauma & Anxiety
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